Dating After 50: Discover New Networks Online - dummies

Dating After 50: Discover New Networks Online

By Pepper Schwartz

People over 50 generally start thinking about online dating because they aren’t meeting anyone new. Most people would prefer to meet someone in person, so they do all the usual things to find dates, like going to art openings, open houses, and cocktail parties and taking on new sports — in general, opening up their life to the possibility of chance encounters of the romantic kind.

It’s the right theory, but sometimes it just doesn’t work. People in smaller towns and cities exhaust their possibilities pretty quickly, and even people in big cities find themselves meeting the same people over and over again or not meeting someone who feels like a good match. So, reluctantly perhaps, they turn to the idea of online dating.

And they should! Online dating’s greatest contribution is that it opens you up to new people. You can meet literally thousands of people in your age group, some of whom you may have passed on the street or at the airport but whom you never would have met in person because you were in different circles that never intersected.

You were not in the same network of folks, but after you go online and enter a new group, you realize there are terrific people out there but they’re living in parallel worlds. Here’s what some people have said about this phenomenon:

Woman, 68: “We were both teaching at the university, but I was in romance languages and he was in fisheries. It’s a big campus, and the places we eat are in a completely separate complex of buildings. If we hadn’t met online, we would never have met, even as co-faculty members!”

Man, 59: “I’m in the import and export business, and I go to China all the time, but I had never been to the Chinese suburb she lives in. I have a certain snobbishness about suburbs, and it’s not a place I would have looked. She travels a lot for her work too, mostly to Europe, and maybe we would have bumped into each other in the airport, but probably not. Meeting her online was the only way it would have happened, so I’m very grateful to the web!”