Accepting that you and your spouse will argue can help to strengthen the marriage, but only if you have the ability to fight fair. If a marital argument arises, use these tools to help resolve the conflict fairly and constructively:

  • Do be clear about what you want.

  • Do stick to the issues at hand.

  • Do look at both sides of the story.

  • Do listen more than you talk.

  • Do apologize when you’re wrong.

  • Don’t look for total victory.

  • Don’t prolong the argument.

  • Don’t nag or withdraw.

  • Don’t take the moral high ground.

  • Don’t go for the jugular.

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Making Marriage Work For Dummies Cheat Sheet