If you’re going through a divorce, basic decisions need to be made with your spouse. Interview divorce attorneys before you decide to hire one to help with your divorce and keep a list of national and local resources available in case you need divorce advice and support.Basic divorce decisionsImportant and difficult decisions have to be made when you’re working out the terms of your divorce, especially if minor children are involved.

Divorce is never going to be an easy experience to go through, emotionally, legally or in terms of the decisions you have to make. You can, however, remove a lot of the pain and hassle from your divorce by following the advice on this Cheat Sheet, and by checking out the organisations and resources you find here.

If you and your spouse decide to legally separate, you won't live together anymore, but you won't be divorced, either. A legal separation agreement (called a temporary court order in some states) is essential if you're separating permanently as an alternative to divorce, assuming that your state recognizes legal separations (not all states do).

Your divorce may be your first encounter with the legal system (except for that appearance or two in traffic court). Understandably, the prospect of dealing with lawyers, courts, and legal mumbo jumbo can be intimidating. One of the best ways to steel yourself for what's to come and boost your self-confidence is to find out about the laws that apply to divorce and the legal processes involved in getting a divorce.

Marriages rarely die overnight. Almost always, the destruction of a marriage happens little by little, over time. Ideally, if trouble arises in your marriage, you and your spouse should be able to respond to problems before they cause serious damage to your relationship. You can then either work things out and remain married, or make a mutual decision to separate or get divorced.

After your divorce is over, you enter a new phase in your life. You may feel happier than you have felt in a long time, free of the tension and strife that plagued your marriage. Life after divorce can represent a time of personal growth, rediscovery, and new opportunities. On the other hand, being single again can be an intimidating and lonely experience — particularly if divorce was not your idea and you are unprepared for life on your own or if you have sole custody of your children.

After your divorce is final, your ex-spouse may not make the spousal support payments he or she agreed to make. This may occur because your ex is angry about the divorce, resents having to send you money, experiences financially tough times, or maybe even remarries and is pressured by his or her new spouse not to make them.

Choosing a divorce lawyer can be overwhelming. After all, your divorce attorney is the expert you'll rely on to help you make the best decisions about your divorce. An attorney can be involved in your divorce from start to finish, or work with you on a very limited basis. (Generally, if you and your spouse both feel confident about your ability to draft your own divorce agreement, you may be able to limit your use of an attorney to initial advice and information and final evaluation and feedback.

As time goes on after you're divorced, you may decide that the terms of your divorce no longer work for you given changes in your life or in your children's lives. For example, your employer is in financial trouble and has asked everyone to take a reduction in salary or your children have gotten older and require more expenses.