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Managing Anger with Emotional Intelligence

Part of the Emotional Intelligence For Dummies Cheat Sheet

Hot emotions, such as anger and jealousy, tend to get you into trouble and can be difficult to manage and control. You can use emotional intelligence to turn hot emotions into cool emotions and calm yourself down with these distraction and coping techniques:

  • Distraction: For example,

    • Count to ten.

    • Think of something incompatible with the situation, such as a warm, sunny beach.

    • Use humor or think of a funny situation.

    • Focus on your breathing, starting with air entering your body, down to your diaphragm, then out.

  • Coping: For example,

    • Consider the situation from someone else’s perspective.

    • Take a more realistic look at your situation.

    • Look at the situation as though it happened a long time ago, which removes some of the shock and intensity that occurs soon after the event.

    • Focus on the situation, not the emotion.

    • Try to see the situation realistically, not as unrealistically and impossibly bad.

    • Be optimistic.

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