How to Use Patience as an Anger Management Technique

The good news for your anger management efforts is that emotions are by their very nature transient experiences. Each episode of anger has a beginning point (onset), a middle phase (where it peaks and begins to recede), and an end point (resolution).

Emotions also work on the principle of gravity — what goes up must inevitably come down. Anger always resolves itself and will actually do so without any effort on your part. The average adult is over his anger within five to ten minutes. You don’t have to react in an attempt to make anger subside.

The relief you’re seeking from the tension and thoughts that accompany anger will come if you just give it enough time to pass. In fact, time is your ally. The real paradox here is that the more time you allow yourself to be angry, the sooner you’ll be free of this emotion.

In order to give yourself enough time, follow these tips:

  • Remind yourself that time is on your side. No one, not the angriest person alive, stays angry very long.

  • Remember that patience is a virtue. No one ever had a heart attack or died an early death as a result of being too patient.

  • Repeat to yourself as many times as necessary, “This too shall pass.” Sometimes a little wisdom goes a long way.

  • Say to yourself repeatedly, “Less is more.” In managing an episode of anger, it often pays to take a more passive posture.

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