Being the Best Man For Dummies (UK Edition)
So you’re best man, congratulations! Worrying about all your roles and responsibilities yet? Don’t be. Follow these quick and simple tips to help you become the best man on the day, even better than the groom, almost. Here’s how.
Best Man’s Countdown toward Wedding Day
It’s a good idea to get yourself and everything else prepared well in advance for the wedding where you'll be best man. Follow this calendar countdown detailing everything on your to do list and when to do it.
12 months to go
The groom appoints you as best man.
Block out the whole week before the wedding in your diary.
9 months to go
5 months to go
Help the groom choose his ushers.
Begin organising the stag do.
3 months to go
Review the wedding plans with the bride and groom.
Accompany the groom to get fitted for your suits.
Start writing your speech.
2 months to go
Finalise the plans for the stag do.
Buy your present for the bride and groom.
Keep practicing your speech.
1 month to go
The stag do
2 weeks to go
Make the ushers aware of their duties.
Check the groom has bought the ring.
Finalise your speech.
1 week to go
Finalise the wedding schedule with the from and print it out.
Hire the wedding suits.
Buy confetti and decorations for the wedding car.
1 day to go
The last supper
Charge up your mobile phone
Stuff your wallet with cash
Ask the bride and groom for messages from absent friends
Check the groom has the ring in a safe place
As best man, you should acquaint yourself with the roles of the other key members of the wedding party. Here are the top ten VIPs to keep in mind.
Bride: Keep her happy and everyone else should remain happy too.
Groom: if you don’t know who he is by now then you’ve got no hope. Just a reminder – he’s the nervous one by the altar.
Mother of bride: This lady is the one who holds all the true power. What she says goes. Don’t get in her way and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
Father of the bride: He’s paying for the lion’s share and isn’t necessarily happy about it. Bear in mind the poor bloke’s probably just blown his pension.
Mother of the groom: She’s not happy about having to play second fiddle to the bride’s mother, so give her a bit of room to swing her handbag.
Chief bridesmaid: She is your female counterpart. Get to know how she functions. By all means flirt sweetly with her, that’s all!
Chief usher: Just as you are the groom’s right hand man, so the chief usher is your right hand man. Bond with him and together you’ll run a tight ship.
Vicar / priest / rabbi / registrar: Whatever the colour of his cloth, he’s an important man. He may even be a woman. Don’t upset him, and converse politely with him afterwards.
Photographer: He’s got a tough job trying to rally together the entire wedding party for the photos. Give the man a hand.
Wedding organiser: This is perhaps the most stressful job of all. The success of the entire day depends on the wedding organiser’s skills and you’ll be very popular if you lend a hand.
Structuring the Best Man's Speech for the Wedding Day
Although every duty on the wedding day is important, the speech is the one duty you’ll stand out for. They aren’t as hard to write as you think either. Make sure to include these steps and finish it off with a toast to ensure a successful speech. Just try not to offend the mother of the groom.
Deliver a killer opening line.
Thank the other speakers.
Unsettle the groom.
Thank the newly-weds on behalf of the bridesmaids.
Congratulate the wedding couple.
Admire the bride.
Ridicule the groom.
Read messages from absentees.
Quote a few famous lines or a poem.
Propose a toast.