The majority of parents do a pretty good job of parenting their children, which helps to ensure that most children will grow up honoring and loving their parents -- and offering eldercare. But what happens when an abusive or absent parent, now up in years, turns to his or her resentful adult child for help? How in the world do you care for a mother or father who showed no love, compassion, or understanding to you when you were a child?

A sense of moral obligation and love motivates many people to take care of such neglectful parents -- but no law says that you must provide financial, emotional, or physical assistance to a parent. Whatever you choose to do, be clear about your expectations. Providing care in the hopes of finally getting a parent's approval or love may be a setup for disappointment.

You can resolve deep-seated hurts and anger between parent and child (or spouses or siblings) as the end of life approaches, but it's still a rare occurrence. On the brighter side, the experience of forgiving a parent and expressing long-buried questions and feelings (and providing care) may be one of the most satisfying experiences of your life.