Dining in Paris

In France, as anywhere, you should never underestimate the importance of good manners. Your meal will be much smoother if you remember essential but basic phrases such as "Bonjour, monsieur" (hello, sir) and "Merci, madame" (thank you, madam). Keep in mind, too, that French table manners require that all food, even fruit, be eaten with a knife and fork.

Contrary to what you may have seen in the movies, never, ever refer to the waiter as "garçon," (boy) and don't snap your fingers at him or her. Instead, say, "Monsieur, s'il vous plaît!" or "Madame/Mademoiselle, s'il vous plaît!" (Sir/Madam/Miss, if you please!).

Most French restaurants are small enough that you may feel as if all eyes are upon you. To feel more comfortable, follow the advice in this article, and you can dine in Paris like a local.

Making reservations for dinner

The vast majority of French restaurants are small establishments with limited seating, and tables are scrupulously saved for folks who book. Always make at least a same-day reservation, even for a bistro. If you are concerned about your language skills, ask the concierge or desk clerk in your hotel to make a reservation for you.

Dressing to dine

Only the most expensive restaurants enforce dress codes (suit and tie), and in theory, you can dress up or down as you like. Parisians, however, are a stylish lot (how do Frenchwomen get their scarves to do that?), even when dressing informally in jeans. Relaxed dressing doesn't mean sloppy jeans and sneakers. The look to aim for is casual Fridays at work.

Knowing the difference between a cafe and a bistro

Eateries go by various names in France, and in theory at least, these labels give you some clue to how much a meal costs. From most expensive to least expensive, the lineup generally goes like this: restaurant, bistro, brasserie, cafe. But never rely on the name of an establishment as the sole price indicator; some of the city's most expensive places call themselves cafes.

The following is a list of the different types of establishments and what you should expect.

• Restaurants are where you go to savor French cuisine in all its glory. Dining is more formal and service is slower. You may also have more than one server.

• The typical bistro offers hearty dishes in a intimate atmosphere. Think crush of elbows and the sounds of corks popping, glasses clinking, multitudes of conversations, and people having a good time. Bistros are where Parisians come to dine most often.

• Literally, the word brasserie means "brewery." Most brasseries are large, cheerful, brightly lit places that open early and close late, and have an immense selection of dishes on the menu. At brasseries, you can usually get a meal at any time of day, even in hours when restaurants and bistros are closed, and the food is relatively inexpensive.

• Cafes serve drinks and food all day from a short menu that often includes salads, sandwiches, steak, mussels, and French fries. Prime locations or famous literary cafes carry higher price tags. Parisians use cafes the way the British use pubs — as extensions of their living rooms. They're places where you meet friends before heading to the movies or a party, read your newspaper, write in your journal, or just hang out and people watch.

• Tearooms, or salons de thé, usually open midmorning and close by early evening. Some serve light lunches, but most are best in the afternoon for desserts with coffee or tea.

• In wine bars, you can order wine by the glass and munch on snacks such as tartines (open-face sandwiches), olives, and cheese.

Understanding the order of a meal

A proper meal consists of three, sometimes four, courses, so portions are usually moderate.

• An apéritif is a light drink that precedes the meal. The French don't like to start a meal by numbing the palate with strong liquor. They stick to offerings like kir, a mixture of white wine and crème de cassis (black currant liqueur).

• You're always served bread with your meal, but you must request butter.

• Water isn't placed on the table automatically — you must ask for it.

• Cheese comes after the main course and is usually accompanied by a red wine.

• Dessert comes after the cheese course.

• The French don't drink coffee during the meal. Black coffee is served after dessert. If you want milk with your coffee, you must ask for a café au lait (ka-fay oh lay) or café crème (ka-fay krem).

• After the meal is finished, it is possible to order a digestif, or a small glass of liquor or fortified wine, thought to aid the digestion. Some classic digestifs are cognac, Calvados (an apple brandy from Normandy), sherry, and port.

If you have food left on your plate, don't ask for a doggie bag. Restaurants are not accustomed to handling these types of requests.

The menu du jour at many establishments includes red or white wine. The standard measure is un quart (a quarter-liter carafe), sometimes served in un pot or un pichet (a pitcher). If wine isn't included, you can order vin ordinaire (house wine) or a Beaujolais (a light, fruity red wine), a Côtes du Rhône (a dry red wine), or a Chardonnay (a light white wine), which are very reasonably priced. And you can always opt for soda, juice, or water instead (l'eau plat is still water; l'eau gazeuse is carbonated water).