The first step in discovering how emotions affect your eating is to understand your relationship with food. Answer the following questions as honestly as you can. Think about how frequently each question is true for you, and respond with words such as sometimes, often, always, and never. By analyzing your responses, you can better understand your triggers — and your strengths.
- Do you eat even when you're not hungry?
- Do you crave certain foods and have trouble controlling the amounts of them that you eat?
- Do you always clean your plate?
- When faced with paperwork or a difficult task, do you find yourself in the kitchen or at the snack machine instead of doing the work?
- Do you eat when you are stressed, angry, lonely, or tired?
- Do you splurge on favorite foods when you're alone?
- Do you feel guilty or unworthy when you eat foods you think you shouldn't — especially high-calorie foods, such as fried items or desserts?
Eating when you're not hungry
If you eat when you're not hungry, you're not alone. Many people eat because the clock says that it's time to, because people around them are eating, or because a food simply looks or smells good. The key is to learn to recognize these triggers and deal with the emotions behind them in ways not related to food. (Of course, if you're hungry, then you should eat.)
Craving favorite foods
If you can't resist your favorite foods, you're probably responding to a craving rather than hunger. What's the difference? A craving is based in emotions; hunger is rooted in biology. When you're hungry, any number of foods can satisfy you, but a craving is a highly specialized, very intense desire to eat a particular food or type of food. During a craving, the desire is sometimes so strong that you may go out of your way to get it. For example, when you crave potato chips, celery sticks just won't cut it.
How best to deal with food cravings? Experiment with a few of the following tips to figure out which work best for you:
- Substitute foods. For example, try a glass of low-fat chocolate milk or a Fudgsicle instead of a chocolate candy bar.
- Use portion control. Buy smaller, single-size servings of favorite foods, such as ice cream, to satisfy the craving and quell the instinct to go overboard.
- Give into the craving. Don't eat around your craving in hopes that it will go away. You'll probably end up eating more food and calories than you would have if you simply gave in to your craving to begin with.
Always cleaning your plate
Do you always feel compelled to clean your plate? Whether this mentality is due to well-meaning parents or a fear that you'll never eat a meal this good again, it's a particular problem for dieters. This kind of conditioning can be especially difficult for people who eat out often because restaurant portions can be gigantic and arbitrary. Restaurants plan their menus for economics and customer expectations, not health. A solution is to order only from the kid's menu. And don't ask for "super-size" portions.
If finishing the bag of chips or the entire burger is your pattern, buy smaller sizes. Counter the fear-of-famine mentality by remembering that more is always available and that, yes, you will have a meal that good again.
Eating instead of working
Procrastination and boredom are very common reasons that people eat. It's a way to kill time and put off doing tasks that need to be done. If boring work or a big project is sending you to the fridge, try reaching for some ice water, raw veggies, or fruit before digging into the cookie jar. Or take a walk around the block or around the office to help clear your head.
Eating when you're stressed, angry, lonely, or tired
Eating to distract yourself from difficult emotions is not a constructive or healthy way to deal with your problems. The more deeply you feel the effects of your emotions, particularly the negative ones, the more you are apt to eat. For overweight people, this reaction may be especially problematic.
If stress, anger, loneliness, or exhaustion is your trigger, work on non-food coping skills:
- Write out your feelings in a journal.
- Go for a walk, play with your pet, or ask someone for a hug.
- Release anger by pounding your fist into a pillow.
- Confront the person who is making you angry.
- Practice breathing exercises, breathing in and out deeply, to help center yourself.
- Ask for time out or help on a project, if needed.
- Take a yoga or meditation class.
- Schedule time for yourself.
- Get a good night's sleep or take a nap.
Eating healthfully around others but splurging alone
Overeating only when you are alone is usually the result of buying into the diet industry propaganda that you hear from television, well-meaning friends, and your own inner voice: "Don't eat too many calories," "That cake is too fattening." Foods get labeled, and if you eat these "good" or "bad" foods, you become good or bad. These thoughts can make you restrict your eating so severely that when you are calm, alone, and not afraid of being judged, you splurge and enjoy all the foods that you otherwise think you shouldn't eat.
This kind of restrictive eating is a sure way to smother a natural sense of hunger and keep the dieting treadmill rolling. Cognitive therapists know that when a negative thought ("I shouldn't eat that dessert" or "It's just going to end up on my thighs") leads to negative feelings ("I'm so fat; what a failure I am"), negative behavior (eating too much of the dessert and continuing to overeat) is sure to follow. Perception becomes reality.
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